Gray Friday

She wakes up this morning feeling refreshed. She is confused, knowing that it is not her alarm that woke her, but just a feeling of wakefulness. She glances at the clock, eyes still with sleep, and sees that, indeed she has an hour or so yet to go before it is time to wake. The day is a glad one, for it is not often that one wakes to have discovered they have awakened too early.

This is a good thing, because it means that now her body will feel rested on a good amount of sleep. It came at the price of tiredness through the rest of the week, but it does not matter, because now is the important day, the day of the test. The terrible test, that has caused much anguish, but yet, when it is over, will cause much joy, because everything will move on, back to the joyous things that are much loved in that world.

So she sleeps for the extra time she has, and wakes even more refreshed than before. She dresses, she eats, she makes herself lunch. She starts her day, furiously typing about the earth, then spends hours giving direction to those who are lost or do not know what they want. She helps her boss in creation, and sees the joy on her face when it is a success, and feels happy.

She leaves to go to the test, and discovers that it was not worth the worry, and she was well prepared for the endeavor. She finishes early, and heads home. What a joyous day, to be done with the days trials so early, in the middle of the afternoon. She rejoices at the time and freedom she now has - committing to a book that has been bugging her incessantly to be read, but that she did not have time to read. So she reads.

After a time, she is done with reading, her craving for words satisfied, and still, the hour is early. But she did not emerge from her reading refreshed, as she usually does. She emerges somewhat saddened. The silence in the room is oppressive, and she feels she must not talk, for fear of disturbing something delicate, yet fearful. It saddens her. Her mind is empty. She does not know what to do with her time. The skies gray, and it starts to rain. She knows the sun will come out soon, but it does not help alleviate the sadness.

She feels trapped - her friends have all planned to cook that night, something that could potentially be great fun. But she was planning on something else. She was going to go out, and see friends who she has not seen in two weeks. But if she is to do that, she cannot be with her friends and the cooking. Which saddens her. If she stays, she cannot see the other friends. The cooking will make her miss her family, miles and miles away. It will make her miss the kitchen, and all the things she's used to having. She will want to add, and create, and make joy with her friends through food, but it will not happen. Such conflict in the soul.

What she really wants is to cook now instead of later, and then after to head out to see her other friends, the ones she has not seen in two weeks, with one of her cooking friends, who also knows these other friends. And be happy and joyous together. She wants her cooking friends to stop their work on this Friday, because Friday is the day of rest. Friday is the day to relax, and let the work rest aside. She cannot adapt her day of rest to be the same as their day of rest, because habit will not let her. She tried changing months before, but was unsuccessful.

For now, she can only hope for the best, because she felt like this the week before, and it all worked out well. And already the clouds are clearing.